The few of you who read much of my blathering know I am mostly under the jolly illusion that my words do my work, and do not fail me, at least as self entertainment.
Today they fail me. I have no news to add but I don't think silence is the proper response. I cannot express the degree of disgust and anxiety with which I recieve news about Israel, Palestine and Lebannon these past two days. All parties there must be certain by now that nearly every rocket or bomb not aimed strictly at combatants will wash blood over bystanders and start fires in their enemy's hearts that will burn for years unforgotten. Yet they all and each tell the reporters how legitmate their actions are.
Dismay and protest pile on from many quarters. I find TruthOut and The Agonist the most interesting readings of the dismal story. There is hardly a place to turn for calmer news. I listlessly flip pages in a copy of Audubon Society's Sanctuary or my gardening magazine. I want calm but I am distracted and cannot attend to calm things.
Calm is not as addictive as worry.
The Bush administration, having shot all its ammo at Iraq, has niether troops nor credibility with the combatants and finally realizing this, sits quietly by. Overreaching neoconservatism that took 50 thousand Iraqi lives as an acceptable cost of empire has dissolved into a vacant foreign policy unable to save lives.
This all gives me a feeling like I am a ghost watching the decay of the world and powerless to act or be heard. My words fail me.